5/8/23 - Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023) - 5-/10

Needle Drop: The Movie. It’s insistent on stopping long enough to play an entire song over the action/sentiments. Consistently it's too much, cheapened and oftentimes artificial - especially when they are so on the nose like Spacehog or the Flaming Lips; it just undercuts it all in an obnoxious way. Though the practice is overdone and presents as a naval-gazey purpose rather than a plus, they can also use the right one to be obvious, relevant and strum the right string (ex. Radiohead and Florence + The Machine). The needle drop stick out at the forefront in thought of the film as a whole, highlighting its capacity for amassed emotion while dwelling on its slick commercial overabundance. Unlike the best song moments in film, especially the first films, this one often lacks resonance and driven magic behind the music, instead relying on them like exposition and pathos crutches… Vol. 3 isn’t awful and for those invested in this MCU train, it can take you for a passable ride, but it is average at its best.

It is cram packed with action set pieces and weakly tries to squeeze in poignancy in between these spectacles. I have seen some praise for the High Evolutionary, the main antagonist of the film, but his motivation and execution were lacking for me. Generic evil scientist/Doctor Moreau without a true purpose, but somewhat inline (to a fault) with the comic. Gratuitous evil for evil’s sake. Even more so with the thrown in and both unearned & unnecessary Adam Warlock. This isn’t a character I ever truly cared about and they nailed that complete vacancy of characterization to a T - which isn’t a compliment.

Much of the cast is solid given what they have to work with. They have emotional outbursts that I suppose count as our “growth markers”. I think one element that truly stood out is how much of my enjoyment of these films derives from Rocket, and so when you remove his agency and dialogue for the majority of its runtime, it just lacks the special sauce that makes it pop.

It didn’t feel like it grew into its ending. But it came to a point of departure for most of the talent and the director; none of which felt organic. The characters wind up in new homes & new goals and that comes off as the point of it all rather than a logical effect of the story. Providing a doorway out than a fully-formed story finale, especially when much of the finale felt impotent as to what it could have been.

Obviously I wasn't super into it, but I can’t say that it was all bad - far from it. The emotional core of Rocket’s tale was affecting, while being handled in a manner to not make it vilely unsightly. He is the emotional crux of the film and is surrounded by sci-fi marshmallow fluff - wacky settings and situations that did feel like a director having fun throwing stuff on screen. I think it veered a bit too much into gags and riffs, character/dialogue/visually, but it wasn’t wholly unenjoyable. 

Honestly, it felt like high octane pop filmmaking for a youthful audience. Songs, splosions, cuteness, and movement standing in for story. Despite the saccharine emotion it was deep fried in, the calories felt empty. Perhaps I am just tired of this dish because I can’t say that I felt hungry before I went to the theater nor any desire for more helpings in the future.

MCU Phase 4 & 5 Cinematic Rankings:

1. SHANG-CHI - 6/7

2. BLACK PANTHER: WAKANDA FOREVER - 6

3. BLACK WIDOW - 6

4. ETERNALS - 5

5. GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 3 - 5

6. SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME - 5

7. DOCTOR STRANGE IN THE MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS - 4

8. ANT-MAN AND THE WASP: QUANTUMANIA - 3/4

9. THOR: LOVE AND THUNDER - 3